Parenting: A Fresh Approach Of Getting Rid Of Mind Clutter

Parenting: A Fresh Approach Of Getting Rid Of Mind Clutter

By Donovan Grant

Are you lugging around an old belief that no longer serves you?

If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably had things happen in your life that you held as fact for a long time. Then one day, you found it was not true. It was just a myth.

Whether we pick ideas up as a child or an adult, we all have things that we like to keep as special.

Have you ever thought that some of these beliefs need to be filed in your archives for ever?

Suppose that you were flying in a helicopter about 1,000 feet above the ground looking down at your life, what would you see? Would you see yourself as successful, confident, responsible, being held back or even stuck?

The thing is that in any given moment we can be happy with who we are and on other occasions it’s not so great. What we can say for sure is that how we feel has got a lot to do with what we believe about ourselves and our surroundings. That’s one reason why it’s good for us to take a look at where we are in life.

Can you think of a time when something that you treasured turned out to be false?  What was it like when you found out?

Just imagine if you will a young sporty 7 year old boy of Caribbean parents growing up in London, UK and being told that “black people can’t swim!”  There was plenty of evidence around to prove it too. His mum and dad were non-swimmers. His sister and brothers did not swim and many of the people in his community couldn’t swim. It had to be true.

The reasons included:

  • Bone density too heavy
  • Skin type not buoyant enough
  • Not enough body fat!

Despite the weight of evidence, I signed up for swimming lessons at school and went along every week. We learnt how to breathe, how to kick, use our arms, use floats and eventually swim unaided! I swam! This will make you laugh … I thought that I was the first black person to swim! It was just another myth and as you guessed I wasn’t the first person to swim. It really makes me laugh as I think about it now.

How many of our children’s dreams are shattered by an old myth that has been passed through the generations?

One thing we know for sure is that adults have old beliefs that they carry around too. Many are not useful to us; yet we have not been bothered to really look into them. It takes a lot of effort.

Just suppose for a moment that every belief has a positive intention. Or putting it plain and simple, all beliefs did us some good at some time in our life. It could have provided protection, it may have been a lesson or maybe it was just a prop we needed before we could move on. Let’s just say we only accepted them because they were good for us.

But what happens when we need to move forward and our current thinking holds us back?

You may have heard that before Roger Bannister, no one had ever run a mile in less than four minutes. On 6th of May 1954 Roger, broke that barrier and he basically open the door for thousands of others to bust the myth. That 4-minute mile barrier was archived into the file of old beliefs forever.

Just ponder on this question for a moment (you can say it out loud or in your mind) ….

“Am I holding on to an old belief that is keeping me back from my dreams?”

“Have I passed on a belief to my children that could stop them from being the best that they can be?”

“What opportunity can I see in my life from the helicopter 1,000 feet in the air that I can’t see from the ground?”

From my personal experience, I know that a time comes when we outgrow some of our old and hard wired thinking. We get to a point where the juice has all been squeezed out and we need to move on to fresh fruit. The thing is that it is hard to do this otherwise we would have done it long ago.

Can we make room for a new more useful belief? Yes, we can. We have the ability to wrap up our old beliefs and pack them up treasure chest and put them away a vault, an attic or a loft. It is not easy to do, but it will be worth it.

Hey mum and dad, could you do with getting rid of an old belief to make room for a new one?

When we take time to review and refresh some of our old thinking, it opens the door to new opportunities.

  • When you change your thoughts, you change your feelings.
  • When you change your feelings, you change your behaviours.
  • When you change your behaviours, you change your RESULTS!


Feel free to leave a comment below and let us know about an old belief that you have overcome. Remember this- Your story has the power to change lives!

Donovan Grant is a coach, mentor, blogger, speaker and IT professional who brings his wisdom of parenting for the last 21 years and coaching clients through the stages of raising youth and empowering leaders with life lessons that are changing generations.  He is a passionate and committed leader who believes that we all have the ability to help to change someone else’s life. Actively doing so as a catalyst for many years he teaches how to live a life of success, balance, integrity and fun, whether at work or at play.

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  • Donovan, a great article on mind clutter.  Yes, I need to apply!  Thanks.

  • Anonymous

    Love this Donovan and love your insights! We are so much on the same page…the good news is that parents are becoming more and more aware of the need to release what is not serving them in order to raise their children from a positive parenting mindset:)

  • Wow Donavan! 
    What a great post. I always love hearing what you have to say. Your posts just keep getting better and better.
    I Love the analogy of squeezing the fruit and needing a new one when the old one has run out of juice.

  • Thank you Donavan for sharing! When we change our thoughts we certainly do change our behaviors! …Great article! …Thanks, Hughie

  • Great content Donovan; when we change our thoughts, we change our habits, our character and our destiny. When our destiny lays dormant on the inside of us, we have to change our thoughts! I don’t want to squeeze a lemon all the time…I would love to squeeze a nice fresh orange! Thanks Donovan!

  • Tamarah

    My mind has been thinking along these exact same thoughts recently.  Great post!  Thank you!

  • Great article Donovan!  Oh how we need to change on our thoughts on a daily basis!  Thanks for sharing! 

  • Thanks Pat. Me too!!

  • Thanks for popping by Denny. Love the quote that parents need to release what is not serving them!

  • Michelle, thanks for that – you just made me blush!!

  • Thanks for the uplift Hughie!

  • Olga, it’s a pleasure to hear from you. Wow! I can almost taste that nice fresh orange juice right now!

  • Hey Tamarah, it’s great to be on the same page with you. Let’s spread the word.

  • Hi Jennifer, we’ve got to keep working. It’s just like when we work out often we get fitter. We’ve got to exercise those thoughts too! Thanks