What Do Parents Really Wish For?

by Donovan Grant on October 24, 2011

What Do Parents Really Wish For?

By Donovan Grant

 

What would you ask of your own parenting genie?

We all have times when you just wished you had your own magic lamp with a genie inside to grant wishes.

Hey why not?  Can you imagine rubbing an old oil lamp and waiting for your own genie to grant you three wishes? 

So many parents seek help from parenting experts on different areas of family life and raising successful children. Their questions range from what is best age for my daughter to start doing chores in the home to how to get my son motivated.

Why don’t we play "Genie" and give some solutions to two of the common wishes we hear from some worried parents.

Granting Your Wishes

Wish #1: Genie, grant me the ability to share more quality time with my children when I have to travel with work.

The Genie says:

Spending time with our children is oh so important and it’s fun too. While they are growing there are so many questions and each answer is special to them. Sadly, we get so many demands on our time and sometimes we feel guilty if we can’t do more.

Do you wish you could have more time with the kids?

Let’s look at Ian who is an IT Professional. His job needs him to travel a lot. During the week days he hardly sees his children morning or evenings. He’d love to get more connection with them during the week.

What other ways do you communicate with your children when you are away from home?

Here’s an example of some of the ways we can keep in touch:

  • Pass messages via your partner
  • Give them a phone call
  • Send them text messages
  • Have a skype session
  • Send them an email.

With today’s technology, we have so many ways to keep in touch with our families.

One thing that Ian started doing was to leave them a note. Whenever he has an early start he would write a personal message to his children. He would leave it in their lunch box for them to find it.

Could you imagine the look on the face of an 8 year old boy when he read the note “you are the best son in the world, love Dad”. The children loved this so much that Ian does this every day now.

The genie recommends that you take the list and choose what works for you. Remember this- nothing really beats you being there in person. However, there’s more than one way to keep in touch and tell your children that you love them.

Wish #2: Genie, grant my daughter the gift of confidence because she is shy in groups.

The Genie says:

Shyness is something that many of us experience at different stages in our lives. As a young teenager, I remember experiencing this myself in school. It takes a lot of effort to overcome it, but I found my voice and confidence that was waiting to share with the world.

Even now I can remember sitting in a French class and teacher asked “Donovan, stand up and answer these questions”. My legs stood up and my mouth sat down.  The words were not forth coming.

What’s it like for your child when they are not prepared to speak out and up in public settings? It can be very tough for a teenager!

One of the challenges for many teenagers is that they don’t want to be seen as wrong or as a failure. So they just remain silent instead of having a go.

You will know that just telling them “you need to have more confidence” will not solve the challenge. Confidence doesn’t grow on trees; it is the result of practicing the thing that your child wants to do. It takes time, but when they do it over and over one day they will look back and say “what do you mean I was shy?”

The important thing is to be there for your child and help them to discover their true voice step by step.

One good exercise that Genie recommends is to go into the Google search engine with your daughter and look for ‘famous people overcame shyness’. She will be pleasantly surprised that other people have faced the same challenges that she has!

Do you have a wish that wasn't answered? Visit the comment section below on this blog post to share it or any other thoughts you have. Maybe we can get the genie to grant a few more wishes.

Let's keep hopes and wishes alive!!

We believe in you and your dreams.

Donovan Grant is a coach, mentor, blogger, speaker and IT professional who brings his wisdom of parenting for the last 21 years and coaching clients through the stages of raising youth and empowering leaders with life lessons that are changing generations.  He is a passionate and committed leader who believes that we all have the ability to help to change someone else’s life. Actively doing so as a catalyst for many years he teaches how to live a life of success, balance, integrity and fun, whether at work or at play. www.donovangrant.com

 


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  • Thank you Donovan…Excellent idea! …”go to Google search engine and search’famous people overcame shyness’ ” …great article! ..Hughie

  • I have always found it interesting that when a parent comes to me with a “wish” almost always they really just need a nudge of confidence…helping them to be aware and alert to their own instincts gets them motivated! Like your great suggestions to use today’s communication technology to stay in touch with their children! Awesome! Great article!

  • Great post Donovan!  Like Denny, I think one of the biggest things parents need is a boost of confidence.  It’s so easy to get down on ourselves when we feel as though we have not done everything with perfection.  Thanks so much for sharing this wonderful article. 

  • AJ

    Great advice Donovan!
    Thanks,
    AJ

  • Loved this Donovan.  I was a subdued personality growing up but it took a while to break loose of that mold I was created in growing up.  Loved the Google advice suggestion too.

  • Donovan, What a great article. It is really amazing just how little effort it takes to make a big impact on someone isn’t it? I love the note in the lunch box. I did this myself when my boys were young and carrying their lunch to school They loved it!

  • Great article Donovan. I like this : Confidence doesn’t grow on trees; it is the result of practicing the thing that your child wants to do.

  • Cheers Hughie!

  • Denny, thanks for the feedback. Your words are so rich and have inspired me to write the article posted on 27 Oct. You are an inspiration to many!!

  • Thanks Jennifer – boost of confidence is such a great way of putting it. A nice dose of self belief will go a long long way.

  • Cheers Carol. Doesn’t it feel great when you break loose. It’s all good learning experience for sure.

  • Michelle, your boys have got a great mum and I am sure they love you more for all those notes. Isn’t it interesting how the simple things still make such an impact in our family lives?

  • Thanks Claudia. I call it the 3 P’s …… Practice, practice, practice!

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